Well it has been a while since I've done one of these. Mainly because I've been busy, but a lot of the time I've been building LEGO models with the boy on Sundays, so we've not done much gaming at all. I aim to rectify that in the coming weeks and Sunday gone, we embarked on a space ship salvage mission on a hostile incarnation of Earth as a duo of Funkatronians by the name of Toejam & Earl!
I should imagine this game needs no introduction, but if it does, where have you been living? Toejam & Earl for the Sega Megadrive, (or Genesis to those 'over the pond'), is a weird, free-roaming, semi-roguelike with some of the most wonderfully frustrating enemies in any game I've encountered before. It's a colourful romp on a crazy planet called Earth as our intrepid explorers walk, creep, run, fly, swim, float and spring across our planet to find their lost, broken space ship.
Now with the review bit done, let me get to the maet-and-veg of this post; my Children's reaction to it...
Exceptionally positive.
As with most 16-bit Sega games, it is hugely colourful, so both kids instantly liked the look and as the game starts with one of the main characters sneezing, (
Toejam, Earl's voice is too deep and cool), it was getting laughs from the start. After briefly explaining the different game modes, (more on those later), we went straight into a 2 player 'Random World' and started out at level 1, (
where else?). As soon as both protagonists came on-screen, both kids laughed. Toejam is a three-legged red dude, while Earl is an overweight orange chap with funny ears. The characters also can interact with each other in amusing ways, like hi-fiving to equal their health out and talking to each other, saying silly things. There's also many trouser malfunctions from Earl and he's frequently embarrassed by his trousers falling down. Silly jokes like that will always make kids laugh, add in fart jokes and you've got a winner.
The games mechanics aren't a problem really, during the game you pick up presents which act as tools and weapons, you can get tomatoes to throw at your enemies, Root Beer to replenish health slowly and even rocket skates to speed across vast distances really quickly. Getting the kids to understand the button presses needed was proving difficult, (they're only 6 and 3), so we left that alone for a bit and concentrated on just moving around, collecting presents and checking the map. This proved to be fun in itself as my boy just wanted to explore, which is really the essence of the game. My daughter was just content with the silly noises, ("burp!" as Toejam drinks some Root Beer), and once the Boy understood that him and his sister didn't need to stay on the same screen, (2 player mode is on one screen when both players are close to each other, but if one wants to venture off and separate from the other, they can as the game goes into split-screen mode effectively), he was off exploring.
For those that don't know, the world in Toejam & Earl is layered like a block of flats, (or apartment block, if you will), and in order to progress to the next level, you take the lift, (or elevator, if you're that way inclined). A fairly simple idea as each level is massive and memory on the 16-bit system, was limited. So...
"Daddy, I've found a lift!", came the exclamation from my 6 year old son as he'd found the exit to the level.
"What do I do? Should I get in it?"
"Yeah!" Uttered his very-close-to-four-year-old sister.
He did as he was told and entered the lift, but nothing happened after the door closed.
"You've got to wait for your sister." I told him, so we patiently waited for his sister to catch up and enter the lift too, once both characters were in, it was off to level 2 via a cut-scene including a fart joke. This is where it started to get funny, when the kids encountered the games eccentric baddies.
Moles, Mental Dentists, Hurricanes, Flocks of Geese, herds of Nerds, angry women with kids in shopping trollies yelling "SHUT UP" in true Council estate style. This game has everything, including Father Christmas, (I kid you not. He's not an enemy but if you see him, sneak up on him, make him jump and he'll drop a load of useful presents. Not as easy as it sounds). Within seconds of exploring level 2, the boy had been stabbed repeatedly by a little red devil and basically shunted off the level. This caused him to go back down to level one. Mortified, he decided to explore level 1 again, easily finding the lift to take him back up a level. He was very pleased at not needing any help with that and he wasn't the only one.
So, back on level 2 and my little girl was busy laughing at her character, (Toejam), dancing with a Hula girl, ("Hubba hubba" says Toejam while shaking his ass), so we caught up to her and checked the map. I briefly explained the game to them, that we had to find and repair our crashed space rocket, then had a look to see if there was any pieces of the ship on our level. There was, so I told them it'll be the same as finding the lift. Literally, (literally, not figuratively), minutes later the ship piece was found by my Son, who by now is pleased as punch thinking he's the Toejam & Earl King. The lift eluded us for a while, but we eventually got ourselves to level 3.
Basically, this game went down a storm. Funny, colourful and quirky is always a winner with my kids. We didn't get far, but we had a jolly good laugh while attempting to get TJ&E back to their home planet of Funkatron. Jokes about bodily functions and some wonderfully weird enemies just go to make this game even moire entertaining. It was even a good spectator sport, it seems, as my daughter got bored quicker than my Son and she stopped playing. I took over at that point and she was more than happy to just sit and watch, laughing when I was shot by cupid's arrow, causing my controls to be all messed up.
Play this game, either alone, with your kids or with a friend. There's a slew of entertaining other game modes too. Check out 'Jam Out' mode for a bit of musical relief. There's the roguelike mode of 'Random World' where everything is laid out differently every time you play, (
Ship pieces on different levels, different lift locations), whereas 'Fixed World' is just that, everything the same whenever you play. This game is easily one of the finest local multiplayer games ever created and a worthy entry into any Sega enthusiasts collection.
I feel I should also briefly mention the sequels to this game too. 'Toejam & Earl 2 : Panic on Funkatron', also on the Megadrive, is a fairly solid game too, just not as entertaining. It replaces the top-down view of the first game with a 2D platform style adventure on the colourful planet of Funkatron. The third entry on Microsoft's Xbox isn't as strong, but is still worth a play if you can pick it up. There's a fourth in the pipeline for modern consoles and PC too that was crowdfunded on Kickstarter. This has yet to be released, but there's a
Website and theme song ready, so I hope that comes to fruition. It promises the same exploration style of the first game, with the addition of internet based multiplayer. I do hope the local multiplayer setup remains too as that really added to the appeal of the original.
Anyhoo, go get this game and play it.
Or alternatively watch the video I made of myself completing it.
Super Mario World. Damn, what a game! Even now, in 2018 when I start playing it, I get a rush when I hear the coin-jingly sound that plays when the game starts. Every level is well crafted and a joy to play, even though the game was actually quickly cobbled together for a speedy release. When the big N gets it right, they get it right! Most Mario games are brilliant and this is no exception.
Pokemon Gold/Silver/Crystal. Wonderful! These games were sequels to Red, Blue and Green/Yellow and were bigger, better and expanded. The original games, Red & Blue, captured the imaginations of a generation. Catchin' 'em all became quite a high priority and with the ability to trade and battle your Pokemon with friends over the link cable gave the game another layer. Honestly, I've got a save file from back in the day with a complete Pokedex. Unless the 20 year old battery has died?.. No, nothing that awful could ever happen, right?
Now, when I heard about Super Mario RPG The Legend of the Seven Stars, it sounded like a project of my dreams; A Turn-based Role Player starring Supe njmhr mMario made by Square. OMG, this can't be real! Well, it pretty much was a dream as the game was released in the NTSC regions only, I'm UK based and that's PAL. Bugger!
